I've been daydreaming all day about the warpness of Ever after in fairy tales, which really started off after i read an article in a UK newspaper that said "Girls who read fairy tales, such as Cinderella or Beauty and the Beast, are more likely to stay in destructive relationships as adults believing that things will turn out for the best.". Apparently, “happily ever afters” and an idea of "True Love" are widely believed. We all know that one day, just one day, we are going to find that one person, start a life together and everything will be just perfect...
I find this widespread belief quite scary.
The notion of true love and ever afters always confuses me. I remember my earliest memories of childhood my Mum reading to me every night a different fairy-tale from this huge old book and me blissfully drifting off to sleep with all this magic filling my dreams. I would ask my Mum and Dad what really happens after happy ever after, and after? And after? They never really told me, i guess i just grew up believing that the ever after would be just like their life, happy, laughing, never fighting, a big house, us kids, good jobs, and almost a white picket fence. But as i watched other families fall apart it kinda dawned on me, my parents weren't living a fairy-tale, they were just lucky and that life after marriage was sometimes pretty from afar but in reality far from pretty.
Then there's the all powerful True Love's Kiss:
If you think about it this part is kinda funny. Because apparently a true love's kiss has more medicinal and cosmetic value than the best of medical science can achieve,
1) It can bring you out out of a coma (Sleeping Beauty)2) It is an anti-venom (Snow white)
3) It is plastic surgery (Beauty and the beast, Frog Prince) For those not in the know, a kiss from a beautiful girl can result in a trans species mutation on the part of the male.
Apparently all we need now is a hot girl's kiss and the man's ugly beastly ways will be gone forever. No wonder us girls are inclined to go out with what are essentially beastly boys thinking they can change them.
What about the issue of beauty in fairy-tales? Typing it quickly into google.com.au, i found some random expert who says that fairy tales could be harmful to little girls because of the whole “if you are beautiful, your life will be peachy”.
If you think about it though the tales always start off with girls more beautiful than the sun itself and a prince of some equally pretty form waltzing them off to this mysterious land called happy ever after. We kinda set ourselves up to fail in life if we believe true happiness is the measure of how skinny you are, the perfection of your looks and the love of a 'prince charming' like man. Basically, in fairyland, without beauty, you are fucked. With the exception of “The Ugly Duckling” which is essentially a story about a misfit, who turns out, is handsome after all. My heart always goes out to the ugly step sisters or the uglier sibling who in fairy tales is always mean. I've been the awkward tom boy, the girl who is so unsure of herself, and i can tell you, through experience, that the pretty/ handsome ones are often the meanest, of course, in fable land, the issue is seldom addressed, or rather, does not make it to mainstream consciousness.
Sitting back and thinking for a minute, i believe women today – despite increasing independence for many – still tend to value beauty and appearance. Why is it that attractive women and men are socially rewarded more than unattractive people? From early childhood, girls are read fairy tales about princesses who achieve vast riches simply because their beauty makes them special. That's a powerful message that can inhibit young women who feel they do not meet society's expectation of what it means to be attractive. Check out your social pages of the news paper or the club pic's and let me know if you spot any of the other types of women, the funny one's, the smart one's, the ugly step-sisters.
Having said all this though, fairy tales are beautiful relics of the past and i'll definatly continue to read them, watch the chick flicks that always make your day a little brighter, and pass on all the stories ive learnt if i ever have a daughter, only though, when it comes to ever afters, i may inject a pinch of salt into the very young mind just to keep it real.
Enjoy dreaming...
I find this widespread belief quite scary.
The notion of true love and ever afters always confuses me. I remember my earliest memories of childhood my Mum reading to me every night a different fairy-tale from this huge old book and me blissfully drifting off to sleep with all this magic filling my dreams. I would ask my Mum and Dad what really happens after happy ever after, and after? And after? They never really told me, i guess i just grew up believing that the ever after would be just like their life, happy, laughing, never fighting, a big house, us kids, good jobs, and almost a white picket fence. But as i watched other families fall apart it kinda dawned on me, my parents weren't living a fairy-tale, they were just lucky and that life after marriage was sometimes pretty from afar but in reality far from pretty.
Then there's the all powerful True Love's Kiss:
If you think about it this part is kinda funny. Because apparently a true love's kiss has more medicinal and cosmetic value than the best of medical science can achieve,
1) It can bring you out out of a coma (Sleeping Beauty)2) It is an anti-venom (Snow white)
3) It is plastic surgery (Beauty and the beast, Frog Prince) For those not in the know, a kiss from a beautiful girl can result in a trans species mutation on the part of the male.
Apparently all we need now is a hot girl's kiss and the man's ugly beastly ways will be gone forever. No wonder us girls are inclined to go out with what are essentially beastly boys thinking they can change them.
What about the issue of beauty in fairy-tales? Typing it quickly into google.com.au, i found some random expert who says that fairy tales could be harmful to little girls because of the whole “if you are beautiful, your life will be peachy”.
If you think about it though the tales always start off with girls more beautiful than the sun itself and a prince of some equally pretty form waltzing them off to this mysterious land called happy ever after. We kinda set ourselves up to fail in life if we believe true happiness is the measure of how skinny you are, the perfection of your looks and the love of a 'prince charming' like man. Basically, in fairyland, without beauty, you are fucked. With the exception of “The Ugly Duckling” which is essentially a story about a misfit, who turns out, is handsome after all. My heart always goes out to the ugly step sisters or the uglier sibling who in fairy tales is always mean. I've been the awkward tom boy, the girl who is so unsure of herself, and i can tell you, through experience, that the pretty/ handsome ones are often the meanest, of course, in fable land, the issue is seldom addressed, or rather, does not make it to mainstream consciousness.
Sitting back and thinking for a minute, i believe women today – despite increasing independence for many – still tend to value beauty and appearance. Why is it that attractive women and men are socially rewarded more than unattractive people? From early childhood, girls are read fairy tales about princesses who achieve vast riches simply because their beauty makes them special. That's a powerful message that can inhibit young women who feel they do not meet society's expectation of what it means to be attractive. Check out your social pages of the news paper or the club pic's and let me know if you spot any of the other types of women, the funny one's, the smart one's, the ugly step-sisters.
Having said all this though, fairy tales are beautiful relics of the past and i'll definatly continue to read them, watch the chick flicks that always make your day a little brighter, and pass on all the stories ive learnt if i ever have a daughter, only though, when it comes to ever afters, i may inject a pinch of salt into the very young mind just to keep it real.
Enjoy dreaming...
